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Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I swear, one chick said she’d only hook up if I barked like a dog—fuckin loco, right? Told her, “I’m Tony Montana, I don’t bark, I bite!” Sex-dating’s a trip, mang—half the time you laugh, half the time you wanna shoot somebody. “This is all we need,” Eve says—nah, I need a chica who don’t catfish me with 10-year-old pics. Stay real out there, or Tony’s comin’ for ya—say hello to my little friend!

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And don't even get me started on the vibe around Lake Geneva's edge. The water glistens like the spotlight on a main event. I sit here, thinkin' 'bout life’s twists like a pro grappler - "Brother, it's all about the journey!" Sometimes, I get all philosophical and say “What’s life, but a series of wild moves?” And wham, my sexologist heart beats faster just thinkin’ it!

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